I Don’t Want To

I’ve been confronting my laziness.

Every time I find a shred of motivation, I tell myself:

“I don’t feel like it yet.”

“I’ve been having a hard time, I deserve a break.”

It’s easy to give in to my impulse to take a break, to rest, but it never feels right.

It never feels like living.

When I think about doing the things I’m passionate about on a daily basis, I come up with a million reasons why it’s a waste of time. No matter what I do, I won’t be the best, so why try? This is the part of my brain that is always selfishly trying to protect me from any possible discomfort. We all have these kind of thoughts, but I’m letting mine drive the car when they should be tied up in the trunk.

I could give you a list of reasons why I’ve been finding life particularly hard lately, but you know what? They’re all BS. Not just because there are millions of people with worse problems who are doing better, but because I have everything I need to overcome them.

It’s never going to be easy, but it’s always going to be worth it.